Cozy in blustery Rochester.

It's a freezing 1-degree outside my hotel room here in Fairport, NY, Philip Seymour Hoffman's hometown (according to NPR) and the town next to Rochester.  Nestled between Lake Ontario and the Finger Lakes, the biting cold is a staple here during winters, but the students at Nazareth College told me it's nothing anyone really gets used to.

I made the drive up from Reading earlier today; watched the sky turn from blue to gray, as snow began to fall, light and airy at first, then fiercely as I winded up local roads. The Interstate doesn't cut through the north-central part of Pennsylvania, so I found myself caught in the post-industrial romantic beauty of forgotten river towns and rural villages. The trek was a solid 5 hours, but it didn't seem too long to me - maybe the scenery forced me to be present in the drive. I let my mind get lost in it. I found comfort in the twang of country radio. On the homestretch, I found myself engulfed in tornadoes of powdery snow, dispersed by blustery winds that were born from stretches of open fields to the left, to the right. I slowed the car and turned on my headlights. I felt my nerves and kept the steering wheel straight, hoping pavement was still ahead. I was worried, but I felt it would work itself out.  Tonight, after the show, a similar predicament befell.  My GPS wasn't working on my phone. Frustrated, I called Rob to see if he could help. I knew it'd be hard to pinpoint my location, but he did his best.  I tried to piece my route together by looking at Google Maps, even if it wouldn't actually direct me.  After wandering, lost, through pitch black country roads, making a U-turn and dodging ridges of slippery ice, I found myself back at the hotel - a fancy Hotel/Spa that sits large and stately atop a hill, unlike its more modest surroundings.

I checked my e-mail and silently chastised myself - I'm checking e-mail and social networks too often. I'm tempted to give Facebook a rest for a month.  I'm craving some time to myself.  But something good came out of it. The student adviser at last night's show at Albright had passed on some music, including Dawn & Hawkes - an Austin couple that made their way to Tuesday's episode of The Voice. I love the idea of them.  I hope they make it through the show... http://www.dawnandhawkes.com/  One of their videos is below.  Goodnight for now.

Back in NYC.

After 5 days of straight shows (and driving), I finally have 2 days to catch my breath.  I hadn't realized how exhausted I was until today.  As much as I wanted to, I wasn't able to sleep in this morning, but after lunch with an old friend and a stop at Uniqlo in Paramus, NJ, I indulged in a much-needed 2.5-hour nap.  Of course that means it's 4:15am and I'm fighting sleep.  Bottomless cups of green tea at dinner with another friend probably didn't help.  But it's OK.  I can write instead.

Last night was my NYC show at The Bitter End, a venue with a long history to me.  It's probably one of the earliest places I played in my career. It was nice to be back and warmly welcomed by the door man and Riyoshi, the sound engineer who I know I can always count on.  Despite the Sunday 10pm time slot, the crowd was great, and a lot of folks stayed after the songwriter session beforehand. CD's were sold, hands were shook, greetings abounded, and even a movie star was in our midst (a Filipina one, KC Concepcion, but still cool! She bought CD's and asked for a picture...which I will post soon, promise).  My heart just felt so full.  It meant a lot to be able to come back to the place where I started and feel like I've grown as a performer since the early days.  It was another great moment to add to many from this tour: an intimate house show at my friend Eric's place in Boston, kazoo-choruses at Colby-Sawyer College in New Hampshire, a performance and interview with Lasell College Radio in Massachusetts, making new fans at Penn State, and grabbing pizza and wings with the students at LeMoyne in Syracuse.  I'm thankful for all the posts on my Facebook wall from the show too, since I didn't have photos of my own to post. :)

Here's the set list from last night:

War!
A Simple Life
Missed Opportunity
First Sight of Land
Blue
Man On the Radio
From Me
Replaced/Counting Stars cover
Isabelle

Photo by Peter Ou.

Photo by Gordon Nash.

From the road.

It isn't always easy being on tour. In fact, it's probably the least easy thing.  There's a heck of a lot of traveling, a lot of catching up with schedules, a lot of coordinating, a lot of meeting strangers, and then there's that snippet of time when you get to do that thing that you love to do, for about an hour or so, when it becomes wonderful.  But once in a while, there are shows that don't turn out wonderful (not so on this tour so far, I'm happy to report). I find myself surprised sometimes that I can still do this, even when it's not easy, when I'm running on a few hours of sleep and lots of caffeine; I'm missing "real" food and people I know. Last night I played a show here in Syracuse, and I had had a really long drive from Boston. I'm not sure how I had the ability to smile, chat, and socialize with the Le Moyne students after the late-night show (they were super funny and relaxed, which helped).


I thought about that this morning, and since it's Sunday and I'm craving my spiritual pick-me-up since I couldn't make it to my family church in Queens, I read some devotionals and came upon this verse, one I've read before but rings fairly true now:

12 Not that I have already obtained this or have already reached the goal;g but I press on to make it my own, because Christ Jesus has made me his own. 13 Beloved,h I do not consider that I have made it my own;i but this one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead... (Philippians 3)

Thinking about this verse, I get very overwhelmed by grace that allows me to continue what I do, even if it's not easy. Somehow, there's a love for music that was placed in my heart, and I feel close to it, even if it's full of struggles - on tour and off tour - and it's a big part of who I am. So, I guess the question I wrestle with is what the main purpose of this is. Sure, it's therapeutic, it's fun to sing about things I write, but how can my music effect bigger change? Is that even what it's meant for? Off I go to live that question...